Thoughts.
OUR LIVES BEGIN TO END THE DAY WE BECOME SILENT ABOUT THINGS THAT MATTER.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
2/9/2018 0 Comments Same Ole ThingShe’s really got you messed up and boy, that makes me nervous.
Will you ever be able to trust us? Or is the world now just fucked? I know you’re scared. She didn’t really care! Even though you tried, She cut it off, said goodbye. I’ve been there, fuck them! Ripping apart our lives. But that’s not who I am and that’s not how we’ll be. I'm different and I understand true loyalty. Stop and give me a chance to show you what I see... It’s your ambition, your drive... they seem to match mine! The passion you have is beautiful. Your sense, your reasons, your words and your rhythm. You’re wild and even goofy. It’s wonderful. I can’t just leave it. We care about the same things. Our sense of loyalty can’t be beat. We compliment each other. I’m funny, you’re funny! And it all comes with such ease. It won’t always be perfect. I’m sure you know that. But I’ll never stop trying, to make you laugh and smile. Eventually, I’ll ask for your life. But right now I just want time!
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I'm spent.I feel so spent right now. I cried a couple times today, not because anyone was mean or they upset me. I cried because a friend and I talked about a couple things lately that've been hard for me. Today was a good day until I cried... since then I've been mostly exhausted.
I know that crying is a normal thing people do and it can sometimes make people feel better. However, it is not a normal thing for me. Crying physically exhausts me. It emotionally exhausts me. If I were to sit around one day and cry off and on all day, I would probably need a full day afterwards to sleep it all off. I've had people say things like "It's not healthy to never cry" or "You need to allow yourself to feel your feelings/process your feelings/etc"... all of that might be true for other people, but crying all the time isn't an option for me. I feel physically ill now because I cried earlier. MY BODY DOES NOT DO WELL AFTER FEELING OVERWHELMED LIKE THAT! Recently I had I friend die. She was originally a teacher of mine, but we grew to be friends and I valued her so very much. When I found out she'd passed away, I wept. However, the crying allowed me to mourn the loss of her life and process that situation. That is one of the rare cases when crying does not wear me out. Crying then actually helped a lot. In normal situations where I have not lost something, I am usually just in a tricky situation or a stressful thing has happened, crying does not help. It stresses me out and adds to my already full plate. This is something I learned about myself today. I had an inkling before, but today really drove that inkling home. It's for sure now. |